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Sex, Love, And Psych
Sex, Love, And Psych

Episode · 1 year ago

Episode 25: Embracing the Present

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

So often we get caught up in cursing ourselves for our past or getting caught up in the hustle of achieving our ideal future that we forget to acknowledge everything we have already achieved. Today's episode is about taking those moments to celebrate progress and cherish our current lives.

Hello everyone, and welcome to you episode twenty five of sex, love and psych I still kind of can't believe that I've done twenty four episodes before this. It's still kind of wild to me. But that kind of segues into what I wanted to talk about today, and that's embracing the present. Many episodes that I have done have been strongly focused on acknowledging the past, working through past situations, past trauma, planning for the future, really working towards bettering yourself. Occasionally I'll focus on something more like present based, but I really wanted to take today to focus on kind of living in the now, and that's going to be today's topic, is embracing the present, living in the now, acknowledging the past, working towards your future, but taking those...

...moments to cherish the present. We all know that it's important to learn from our past and work towards that better future, but we often get so caught up and these things that we forget to acknowledge how far we've come and how much we have already accomplished and how many of those check boxes we've already marked off and how much we've already done. If we're already folk. If we're sorry, if we're always focusing on what's next, we forget to enjoy that we've already reached so many things we were once striving for. I think I saw a facebook post or something the one time and it said something along in the lines of if we're always focusing on what's next, we forget to acknowledge how much of our current lives is what we were looking forward to yesterday. There's a slightly differently worded but that's same sentiment of like, wow, sure...

...we still have so many things on our checklist, yet, whether that's a house, a career, a partner, whatever that looks like to you, that we forget that we've already accomplished so many steps that it takes to get to those areas. Today's society moves so fast and trends technology the next best thing. That constantly being hustling, no sleep, always having everything on the gost side, hustles all that and striving for that better life, that American dream, even even if that has transformed in the last fifty six years, that we don't acknowledge all the progress we've already made, like even in my life, even social media ten years ago was so vastly different than it is now, and I think we get caught up in the amount of progress we've...

...made that we miss acknowledging just how like incredible technology has already become. So applying that to ourselves, we can get so caught up in those professional, academic, mental emotional health goals, friendship goals, relationship goals, etc. That we kind of forget to acknowledge how much progress we've already made. Like for me specifically, I've been feeling like I'm sitting at multiple forks in the road in regrets to deciding about various aspects of my future, whether it be my love life, what degree I want to do next, where I want to live, what certification I want to do next, my career path, etc. I've been second guessing a lot, feeling like a lot of past traumas in multiple areas of my life we've just been piling all on top of me at once. I've cycled through a lot of anxiety, feeling lost,...

...that imposter syndrome like you name it, I have been cycling through it lately, and this isn't to say like you should be concerned about me. I've had some shitty days, but I am working through it. Most of its good days. It's just I can get caught up in those next steps without seeing all the steps I've already taken. Oh Yeah, what I've been forgetting to do is take those crucial moments to pause and acknowledge absolutely everything I've already accomplished, celebrate that Progress I've made and just enjoy the stage I'm currently in, even if there's certain spots that are less than ideal and not as perfect as I would like. For this next portion might sound like I'm bragging a little, but it's just me putting my kind of do in. The walk the walk, if I'm going to tell you guys what to do, because...

...in the past year, two years, six months, whatever, I've surrounded myself and then absolutely amazing support system, then I know I can reach out to safely at my worst moments without feeling fearing judgment or fearing being manipulated or gas lighted, and that's huge progress. In my personal friendships and relationships, I've gone through a lot of that gas lighting, made to feel like my emotions aren't valid, meant to feel like I'm eons behind everyone else in my friendships and relationships, but I have made so much progress in that and I have such an amazing support system that if I'm having a bad night, I can send a text to a couple friends be like hey, I'm feeling really shitty and I know that they will jump to action and do whatever they can and whatever I need to get me through that shitty moment and I don't have...

...to feel like they're going to judge me or feel like I'm week or feel like I'm attacking them if I'm feeling insecure any of that. I've grown so much in my independence, confidence and self perception. I've put so much work into how I view myself and how confident I am in my own abilities and my own independence and just leaning into who I am and what I can do for myself. That's absolutely something to be celebrated. I've been published in an online friggin academic article. I have five months left in my degree, which is still absolutely unreal to me. I'll be em seeing at my older brother sweating with my little brother. That's a big public speaking thing that who knew that I would be doing wild I've already gone to three races this month,...

...which doesn't seem like as big of an accomplishment, but I've already met so many new friends and just people through this and I've been able to dress, they we the way I wanted and express who I am. I'm just go out and interact with new people and that that's all huge for me as well. I started a new job recently. I just hung an instructor photo shoot for my new job yesterday. I'm still working through training, but I am absolutely so excited. If you would have told me just over a year ago, when I still had my freaking cast on and my boot and like, my crutches and everything set, not only would I be back at the level I was before my injury in poll but I would also be starting to teach...

...and instruct people basic pull, I would have thought it was wild and crazy. That's a little bit when imposter syndrome coming in. It came in a little bit yesterday at the photo shoot. I had to be really gentle with myself with the level I'm at compared to the level of the other instructors. But, like this is a huge accomplishment. I'm really excited to move forward in this and explore that independence and confidence and being able to pass that on to new poll students or Bachelor at parties, which I'll probably we've been doing a lot of. Like I'm absolutely thriving and I need to take time away from combing through every possible future outcome and future path with a fine tooth comb and just fully embrace and celebrate where I'm at right now, even if I still have a retail job and I don't know, my love life isn't amazing,...

...it's not actually bad. I'm not getting married by a little bits, but that's totally fine with me. I am embracing who I am and where I'm at in my life and who I've become compared to five, six years ago, when I didn't think I would make it to this point. Even. Sorry, getting a little choked up there, but I'm gonna keep moving forward. That's this, just me taking that moment to pause and really celebrate where I'm at and encouraging you guys could do the same thing. There's always going to be more things on the checklist to achieve, like that, buying the house, being in your career, having that partner, if that's something you're looking for it, but it's got to stop and acknowledge all the amazing Shit you've already accomplished and how much progress you've made. I've seen for and...

...that I've known for a year or two even make so, so much progress in their mental health and their professional health and in the relationships and everything and just transforming in front of me and I am so, so proud of them and I know they're super proud of me and I need to be just as proud of me. All this isn't to say ignore the past. If you've listened to my previous episodes, even just last week's episode, you know I'll I strongly, strongly believe in acknowledging how the past can affect us and acknowledging what has happened. And this is also not to say don't concern yourself with the future or make plans or make that checklist. We do have to take those steps toward being who you want to be, or will never get there.

But this is just about acknowledging the progress you've already made, practicing gentleness with ourselves, celebrating every little achievement and finding those peaceful moments to practice gratitude for who we are, how far we've come, where we currently are at and how, even if it's just the small, little baby steps in different areas, if we celebrate those, the big steps are going to come even faster. One of my friends that I got to spend some quality one on one time with this weekend. We had so much fun, but she told me like even those baby steps, like celebrate it, get yourself some chocolate, take yourself first spot a just absolutely embrace every tiny little step towards progress that you make, and I just absolutely cherish that advice because I tend to...

...be so hard on myself, as I'm sure many other people do, and I tend to really, really downplay Progress I've made in multiple areas, especially when it comes to things that are cyculated and mental health related and overcoming trauma and stuff. I hold myself to such a higher standard than I would hold it anybody else too, and one of my biggest tips for that is, if you're having as heart of a time with that as I sometimes do, I tend to take the dialog or the issue or the progress or whatever it is that I have made and imagine one of my friends or family members or just someone I love, making that same progress and taking those same steps and...

...picturing how excited and proud of that person I would be and trying to reflect some of that back onto me, because if I would be proud of the people I love, I love myself, I should be just as proud of me for making those same progress. Progress is progress. It's not always linear. Sometimes you dip down, sometimes you take a few steps back, but every time you move forward, if you celebrate that, you're going to just keep inching forward and one day you're going to look back and you're going to be so grateful that you took those baby steps and you're going to look at you're going to take one of these moments to acknowledge where you are and you're going to be so grateful that you took all those tiny steps to get there, because they all added up to a really, really big step of progress in mental health, academic pursuit, your career. All of those baby steps...

...are going to just surmount to like this big journey. So this today's episode is just all about being kind to yourself, celebrating yourself and just doing what you can to acknowledge that life it can be fucking tricky. Sometimes it can be really rough out there and you're still here, you've made it this far. You're probably a different person in a lot of ways than you were two years ago, and that's to be absolutely celebrated. Even just making it through the majority of this pandemic, even though we're not quite in the clear, things are feeling back to normal and we made it to this point and that is something to be celebrated so much so I just invite you to take some time this week to really celebrate the progress you've made and the steps you've taken,...

...your accomplishments and where you're at right now. Today's a little bit of a shorter episode. Hope you don't mind. Thank you so much for tuning in today. Guys, I know this is a step away from the more sex and relationship topics, but I do think it's important to acknowledge our personal accomplishments as well, and that can actually seep into a lot of our friendships, relationships and all of that fun stuff. So again, thank you so much for tuning in. I hope you have an amazing week and I will talk to you next week. Thank you so much. By just a little PS that I wanted to add at the end here. Just wanted to say I'm so proud of you.

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